Pancreas Cancer Web


First, i want to say a lucked up on this site by during research and trying to get a understanding of pancrean cancer. I have read so many stories and I still don't understand. My father Johnnie 60 years old on 1/21/06 passed away on 1/28/06. My heart is numb, sometimes i can't breathe. Two years ago he was diagnosed with pancrean cancer and underwent a whipple surgery, he recovered so well from it, but my father was a very proud and strong man he did not want anybody fussing over him, he kept the all of this a secret, he never came out and said he was sick and was not going to get better, my dad lived alone and he went to his doctor visits alone and when we would check on him and ask what did the doctors say he would just say that he was okay. Around christmas time he spend it with me, i noticed he had lost alot of weight and also he was very weak, I knew in my heart that something was very wrong, but i did not want to pressure him. i begged him to let me take him to the hospital, he refused to go, like a said my dad was a very proud and independent man, he always wanted to help someone else but he did not want help for himself. Right after we celebrated his birthday, I then noticed that his feet was swollen so bad that he could barely move around, i told him i am taking you to the doctor, on that monday we went, he was told that the cancer had spreaded to his liver and that he had about a month to live, i was devastated, HOW!!!!! I was told that i would have to think about hopice care for my father to make him comfortable during his last days. He died before i could even get the hospice going, five days later!!!! I miss my dad sooo much, he was loved by everyone, his grandchildren, friends and family. Now that i have had so much time to think, i have come to realize that he wanted it this way, he did not want to be a burden on any of his children and he did not want us to fuss over him. he never complained about pain he was a soldier till the end.

Posted 05/19/2006 01:55 pm by 'Daddy's baby girl'
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