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Pancreas Cancer

Been there - sorry your are cl was posted 03/31/1999 07:11 pm by Carla
E-mail Address: CUngerecht@aol.com

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I am so sorry to hear about your dad. My mom died March 2, 1998 after 1 year of dealing with PC. Your Hospice Nurse should have a pamphlet about the last few weeks/days/hours. Ask her for it. I wish I could have recommended the book "Final Gifts" to you earlier. You need to read it - things will make sense. My mom talked to all sorts of people - all who were gone. She talked about eating dinner with them, dancing, laughing, etc. She would talk to a corner of the room where my "dad" was. She talked about the beautiful table that he had set for the first dinner together, the beautiful flowers he picked, etc. I just lost my uncle 8 days ago and he did the same thing. Two days before he died, everything dropped (heart rate, etc) and he just kept smiling. When he pulled out of that he told me he saw heaven and it was beautiful. He told me my mom (his oldest sister) was waiting at the gates for him but said not now maybe tomorrow. His family was able to get everything arranged and told him so and he did die the next day. I guess it all depends on your beliefs on what you think is real or the "meds" you dad is on. After reading Final Gifts and looking back on my mom I really believe the dieing see people and talk to them. Mom hadn't been out of bed for 2 weeks and not eaten for just about as long. On Sunday she was sitting up, eating, laughing and talking with all her borthers and sisters (12 still living). After they all went home she went to sleep never to wake again. She died on Monday morning. If is the end - don't be afraid - it can be a beautiful thing. Looking back I would never want mom back the way she was. I miss her terribly - I was her sole caretaker (my husband and daughter helped) - neither one of my brothers wanted to help. I cherish the memories I have and they help me to keep going. Tell your dad you love him as he is going - he can hear you. Hold him, rub his arm, stroke his head, tell him that it OK you will be OK. He needs to hear that and you need to say things to him - you will have no regrets only memories that will keep you going. I don't know you but if you need a smile please e-mail me at CUngerecht @aol.com.My thoughts and prayers are with you and your familyCarla

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*DISCLAIMER: This page is an unmoderated forum, and the opinions expressed herein do not necessarily reflect the viewpoint of The Johns Hopkins Medical Institutions. Patients are advised to consult their personal physicians before making any medical decisions.
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