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LEW


Lew was 70 and a great pop. We lost him 2 years ago, 35 days after pc had been confirmed. He had bloating starting in the spring. Dr's diagnosed stress, his sister had died a few months earlier, and Mom and Dad were caring for his now wodowed brother-in-law. Starting in the summer he started to complain or back pain. Diagnosis - muscle strain. By the time of the family vacation, he was taking Axid for his stomach and a muscle relaxer for his back pain. I remeber having a vague fear the entire time these seemingly innocent symptoms were going on that something serious was going on. Dad and Mom went on their dream trip to Europe at the end of the summer. When they came home I was shocked at how he looked. Sick. i started doing reasearch, and the only disease that seemed to fit his symptoms was pc. But I knew I had to be wrong. Once they were home from Europe he went in for more tests -- a CT and blood workup. The Ct showed something on the pancreas and the blood work should liver involvement. On 9/20 he went in for an ERCP. I took the day off to sit with Mom. I broached the possibility of cancer with Mom, accompanied by all the right confidence - we'll fight it, blah, blah. the doctoor came out, walked over to us, and changed our lives. Pancreatic Cancer, terminal. Pallative treatments possible. I called my sisters, and called our parish. 35 days later Dad was gone. it weemed that everytime we could get news, it was worse than we expected. We got hospice at the end, only 5 days it turned out. We kept Dad at home and we were all with him at the end ,even the dog laying with his head in Dad's lap. I hated Dad's cancer doctor's because of their treatment of him, as if he were already dead. But i never blamed his gp doctor, I know they did the best that they could. My Dad did give me a wonderful gift. In his last hours, when we had the priest there to give him annointing, Dad declined. He asked instead that boyfriend and I come to him. We came into the bedroom, and Dad told my boyfriend that his unfinished piece of fatherly business was to give away his daughter in marriage. My loving boyfriend proposed to me right there, with Mom and Dad watching. Dad layed down (he asked for a chocolcate milkshake), and he passed a few hours later. My boyfriend and I were married 8 months later. Isn't it something, that even in his last hours, he watched out for me.


Posted 02/26/1999 04:19 pm by Gracie
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