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Pancreas Cancer

Becky was posted 02/28/1998 08:02 pm by Annie
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Speaking as a teen myself and just loosing my dad to this horrible disease all I can tell you is what was best in our home. Tell your kids every little detail as soon as you know it. Let your children get as involved as they can. My mom taught me how to give injections, do hickman line flushes and heplocking them...and how to set up and disconnect dad's iv's....I am 14. Make sure they get to say all there "i love yous" and the best thing I think is that my dad was home in his own bed with us till the last breath was taken. We all were there even my brother who is 11. Personally the best closure I was able to get was by taking the time in our own home to wash my dad's face and hands after he had died ...it gave me a chance to say goodbye and do one final thing for him...all us kids were involved in that in some way. Daddy lasted for 1 year and 3 months and at the end weighed close to 90lbs which was a big difference from the strong daddy of 210lbs. My parents never hid a single detail from us. No sooner was it out of the doctors lips than we were told or we were there. All of us. That was important. Even how each other felt was important to know. I don't think false hope would have done me alot of good...I needed to know the realistic outcome even though I hated to know it. We were brought to the edge many times with my dad. We thought he was going to die about 4 different times. For us we knew that the last time was the real thing because he lapsed into a coma probably for about 2 days and his the blood seemed to settle in different areas of his body where he was laying ..and his hands and arms jittered, this doesn't mean to say that that will be the same for everyone. Let the kids cry as much as they need to when they need to.I think maybe we did alot of our grieving as children before he actually died . At time all alone the road since diagnosis we seemed to grieve. I think that made it easier in the end. It was almost a relief in a strange way. It was a long journey...walk it hand in hand with your children every step of the way and when one of you stumble the others are there to pick them up. It isn't fair but life isn't always fair. Hope I helped. Annie

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*DISCLAIMER: This page is an unmoderated forum, and the opinions expressed herein do not necessarily reflect the viewpoint of The Johns Hopkins Medical Institutions. Patients are advised to consult their personal physicians before making any medical decisions.
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